Excerpts
99 Things You Wish You Knew Before Stressing Out! is now an international bestseller in it’s categories in three countries; USA, Canada and UK!
#3: Staying Sane in the Midst of Insanity
According to a recent study by the American Psychological Association, 75% of Americans experience “mega stress”.
Stress is simply a signal within your body giving you an amazing opportunity to identify and adjust your perception of a situation, along with your behavior. We forget that whatever we focus on grows bigger quickly … positive or negative. Here are three quick tips to help you stay sane in the midst of the insanity:
- This is worth repeating: know what you value most in life. Stress creeps in when you forget what you value most in life. When you spend most of your energy on the “non-essentials” in life, you begin to feel depleted very quickly, and the stress hormone begins to double. Create moments, every day, which nurture what you value most in this life and notice how quickly clarity of thinking and inner peace return.
- Let go of this belief: In order to be loved and accepted, I need to be perfect … have the perfect house, relationship, car, person, family, job, credentials. What is your inner list of requirements in order to feel loved and accepted in life? Let go of your need for certain outcomes in order for you to feel good about yourself. Happiness returns when you release the attachments you have in life in order to feel good about you. Remember, joy flows from the inside out, not the outside in. Start loving yourself completely—just as you are, right where you are. If you lack it, borrow it from God’s heart, where the supply is limitless.
#37: The Drug of Approval
Once again, I draw on the profound wisdom that comes from my spiritual mentor Anthony de Mello.
Whenever you cling to anything in this life—whether it is a certain response from the world; a relationship; a material item or desired outcome—happiness dies and anxiety increases.
Since you were little you began to learn very quickly what to do and say to get a desired outcome or response, and your addiction to the drug of approval began. It is similar to a spoiled child, the more you give it, the more it wants. This addiction to approval is fed by your desire to be acknowledged, approved of, popular, validated and praised. It is as if you are saying, “Please tell me that I am good enough, appreciated, smart enough and worthy to be loved and accepted.”
It is a serpent of a drug and will sap you of any remembrance that you already have everything you truly need within your soul for happiness to occur; along with inner peace and joy. It makes a mockery out of you with the antics you play in life all for a momentary high of being approved of or acknowledged.
Being a visionary and motivated human being is of considerable value. It is when you look to those around you to tell you that you can or cannot do something in life, or you only believe in yourself because someone told you how great you are, that you become vulnerable to the experience of forgetting who you are with your God given inner strengths and abilities.
It is a wonderful practice in life to maintain inner calm and connection in the presence of praise or criticism. In this experience, you are able to remain in your castle (connected to God). Remember as with any addiction in life, the more you feed it, the more it consumes you along with your ability to remember who you truly are.
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