Excerpts

#1: Having a Shotgun Wedding Does Not Mean Jumping the Gun

In this example, jumping the gun doesn’t exemplify the traditional meaning. It means don’t blurt! What is blurting, you might ask? Here’s a case in point.

Caitlin was caught up in the excitement of the sparkling new ring on her finger and went shopping for a wedding dress. Buying that wedding dress was the single most important thing on her mind. She found her Cinderella dress and paid the $1,500 that was on the price tag. She was excited about her purchase, until she found out that the total budget for her wedding was $5,000. Caitlin had yet to pay for the venue, photographer, florist, caterer, D.J., and thank you gifts, not to mention the hundreds of other hidden expenses. She blurted! She jumped the gun and spent a good portion of her money before she knew how much she had to spend.

Other brides make the mistake of buying as they go, as opposed to shopping around prior to making a decision. It’s akin to going to the grocery store and randomly tossing items in the shopping cart, only to experience sticker shock when you see your total. This approach to wedding planning will result in overspending.
Julie acted in haste by hiring the most expensive photographer in town. She had not researched the cost of her wedding flowers, so she was disappointed to learn that she would not be able to afford the decorations she had dreamed of, due to spending too much money on the photographer.

Doing research ahead of time will give you an overall idea of what your dream wedding is going to cost. From this knowledge you can draft a budget. Unless you have limitless funds, you will most likely need to compromise and prioritize.

#3: Two’s Company, Three’s Ideal

I recommend that you interview three of each vendor. Wedding planners, photographers, florists, caterers, DJs, videographers and cake bakers are among the top ones. They will assist you with making wise choices. Choose the vendors that you feel most comfortable with and who share your vision.

Unless this isn’t your first trip down the aisle, you will soon discover that everything costs more than you thought it would. As with every industry, there are a few unscrupulous vendors, but they are not the norm. Contrary to popular opinion, wedding vendors are not out to rip you off. You are hiring highly skilled artisans whose costs of operation are high; therefore, they won’t come discounted to you. I will also tell you that you will get exactly what you pay for in the wedding business. If, after interviewing vendors, you opt for the cheapest one, you might find out just why they are so cheap. Keep in mind that wedding vendors are interviewing you, as well. They will accept you as a client if you are kind, sincere, easy to work with, and willing to consider their professional advice and suggestions. Your vendor should be mutually respectful of you and your choices.

You can gather a lot of information from the vendors’ websites and by phone. However, it is still better to meet with them personally and get a vibe for how well you could work together.

Attending bridal expos is a time efficient way to meet many vendors in one day. You will be able to view each vendor’s work and speak with them individually. Bridal shows usually feature a fashion show to give brides ideas for dresses and color schemes for their wedding. Register for all of the door prizes that are given away at these expos. Some travel agencies give away honeymoons or airline tickets. Other vendors give a discount on a service or other free products. It will be worth the price of admission to get all this free information. Additionally, meeting with different vendors will give you a good median price to begin to build your budget.

Don’t wait until the last minute to book your wedding professionals. The best ones book eight months to one year in advance, and the busiest months for weddings are May-September. You should also expect to pay a deposit when you book a vendor. All of us have different policies. Some require a thirty percent deposit, while others require fifty percent down. Generally, cash or a check is required for the final payment, which is usually due one week to thirty days prior to the wedding.

Once you select your vendors, share your visions with them and then trust them to do their job. If you have chosen a reputable vendor, you should not need to call them repeatedly. Though you are important to them, you aren’t the only bride with whom they are working. Compile lists of questions before you call or e-mail them. Once you have settled on the details, avoid bombarding them with phone calls. Be considerate of their time. Most vendors are available night and day, but remember that they have weddings on the weekends, so please don’t call them then. You wouldn’t want another bride taking your vendor’s time on your wedding day. Your vendors will devote their time to you when it’s your turn.

Be realistic. If your dream is a celebrity style wedding, you aren’t going to get it for a thousand dollars. We consistently have brides who want everything dripping with gorgeous flowers. They want the reception hall draped with fabric, special effects lighting, and centerpieces for thirty or more tables, and their budget is $1,000. It easily requires hundreds of yards of fabric to drape a ballroom. The cost of the fabric alone would be more than your entire decorating budget. Add to that the labor for a staff to spend a full day or two hanging it, and you can see that it is possible to run out of money very quickly.

Do-it-yourself centerpieces can save you money but still won’t be inexpensive, particularly if you have a lot of tables. If you spend only thirty dollars per table and have fifty tables, that alone would cost more than your $1,000 budget. That is before you have paid for a bouquet, bridal party flowers, decorations for the ceremony site, or table linens, not to mention other additional details you may want to include. If you want a fairy tale wedding, it will come with a hefty price. When you meet with the vendors, have a realistic budget in mind. Tell them up front what your budget is so that you don’t waste your time or theirs. Telling them your budget allows them to make suggestions that will fit within it.

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